Hotel Room

In a dimly lit hotel room,
he waited.
For four hours now,
he had waited for her to come.
It was pouring outside,
and thunder drowned out other noise.
He watched the clock,
ticking the minutes away
agonizingly slow.
He heard a knock on the door
and his heart raced,
but his excitement turned to dissatisfaction
as he heard “Room service!”
He opened the door disgustedly,
took the ordered bottle of wine
and threw a tip at the bellhop,
slamming the door in his face
without so much as a “thank you.”
He sat down on the edge of the bed
and flipped on the television,
hoping she hadn’t forgotten where the place was.
He restlessly wavered through channels,
hoping to waste some time.
He supposed, for the neighborhood it was in,
that the hotel was sort of obscure,
far back from the road.
He paced around the room,
his mind beginning to wander in paranoia,
fearing that something had happened to her.
His anxiety reached a peak, and he finally
picked up a pillow off the bed,
and threw it across the room in worried anger.
Finally, he cracked, and he grabbed his keys
to go for a drive, to clear his head.
He dashed to the door and ripped it open,
and froze.
His fiery anger turned to fiery passion
as he saw her face, drenched from the rain,
but smiling,
and he looked into her eyes,
and forgot everything else.
“Sorry, got a flat tire.” she said.
It was all he could do to nod an “O.K.” to her,
for her appearance at the door had taken his breath away.
He stepped aside to let her in,
and as he closed the door, she
stepped toward the bed.
“I’m beat,” she said, as she turned toward the bathroom.
He just wandered toward the bed, and
climbed under the covers.
He watched the door, waiting for her to reemerge,
for what seemed like an eternity,
until she finally stepped out, flicking the light switch
walking to the other side without clothing.
She climbed under her side of the sheets,
placed her hand on his chest
and whispered into his ear,
“I love you,” as he turned off his lamp.

#240                                                08-29-07

The Evolution of A Passion

Like an epidemic, these once-subtle feelings for you
have now inflicted every part of me,
leaving me with a fantasy without bounds.
I fall asleep dreaming about it,
spend every waking hour wishing it were the truth.
Oh, how I long to kiss you passionately,
just once,
and feel the fire inside burn my heart until
I can do nothing but succumb to this love for you.
How I long to stare into your blue eyes for that minute before,
to know you feel it too, to see the fire alight inside you,
to know that I exist in the Paradise hidden in those eyes.
But I’m afraid.
I’m afraid of your power over my heart,
I’m afraid to let you see that my one true weakness
is this unadulterated, undying love for you.
I’m afraid that just one kiss won’t be enough
after the first time, that this love will manifest into
a wildfire burning out of control inside me,
but isn’t that what should happen to one
with a true love for another?
There can be no other explanation
for what you inflict so mercilessly in me.
To lose you would be this poor heart’s suicide,
the death of a love I can never let go of.

But right here, right now, I just want to press
my parched lips to yours
and taste the sweet nectar of a love
I’m dying to share with you.
I want to know that my one true,
unshattered dream is finally a reality.
I want to be the affliction in your heart,
just as you are the affliction in mine.
I want to fall asleep with you beside me,
listening you the whispers of your breath
flowing across your skin into my ears.
I want to write books full of blissful memories,
with your eyes, your smile, your mind and soul
etched into each cornerstone.
I want to feel this ethereal passion
reach every last piece of my soul,
to flood my senses until I drown
in the sweetness of your kiss.
I want to feel the culmination of
every last feeling of love I have for you
explode from the depths of my heart
and flood your mind, reach into your soul,
touch your heart.
I want to feel your blood boil when we touch.
I want to feel the electricity
flowing through my fingertips
when I close my fingers around yours.
I want to experience the perfection
written in your presence.
I want to hold that divine beauty in my empty arms
and feel your heart beating against mine.
I want to lose myself in the labyrinth of your heart,
and never be allowed to leave.
I let these feelings for you consume me,
and I want to spend every remaining minute of my life
with you. I want to use my last breath to whisper
into your ear that I’m going to die the happiest man
who ever lived, because you were with me until then.

But right here, right now, I just want to kiss you.

#239                                                           08-29-07

I Want To Be

I want to be better than me,
because “me” isn’t good enough anymore.
I’m tired of being kicked to the curb,
I’m tired of accepting everything less
than even second best.
I’m tired of being just another face in the crowd.
I want to be one in a million.
I want to be remembered for what I’ve done
and what I didn’t do.
I want to stand out, to be noticed.
I want to be heard,
I want to invoke thought and passion.
I want to be talked about after I’m gone,
to be the conversation topic of millions.

But, at the same time,
I just want to be myself.

#238                                                08-28-07

Feeble

“The end”
Two words I never wish to see again.
Never written in the expressions on your face,
never spoken in the voice
I’d walk a million miles just to hear.
I never want to hear you say that this is the end.
Not even of a relationship, but of or our friendship.
I’m too far past gone to be saved
from the misery I’d feel if I lost you,
your smile,
your eyes.
I can’t lose you, even if that means
enduring a lifetime of trials and tribulations
You are embedded deep within my heart,
and it gives me a sense of bliss that you’re there.
You give me a sense of complacency
that no one else has ever given me,
and I couldn’t survive without it.
Please, don’t ever say that it’s the end between us,
because I’d crumble without you close to me.

#237                               08-28-07

A Step Backward

Sometimes life doesn’t follow the rules.
Sometimes it’s desire
that turns us into ruthless animals,
with a thirst for what we despise the most in others.
Sometimes it’s the truth
that makes us run for our lives.
Sometimes it’s those we hate the most
that we run to first,
to make us feel human,
to make us feel not perfect,
to relieve us of the fallacies hidden
in the most lethal words
of our closest friends.
Sometimes it’s our enemies
that keep us sane, level-headed
and sometimes we need to escape
from those closest to us.
Sometimes we just need
to take a step back
and look at all this confusion,
and realize that, sometimes,
the world isn’t supposed to make sense.

#236                                     08-27-07

No Explanation

I can’t explain why
I still think of you so much
why I still love you
when you’ve said that this was
an entirely hopeless pursuit.
I can’t explain
what I see in your eyes
and your unparalleled beauty,
what I hear in your voice,
what I feel from your touch
and your presence
that makes you so irresistible
I can’t explain how
I fell so much in love with you
or why this passion runs so deep
in my heart that I can’t control it.
I don’t know if this fire will burn
until the end of time,
but the fact of the matter is that.
Even when we go our separate ways,
it will still be your blue eyes
and your absolutely stunning beauty
that I’ll fall for over and over again.

#235                                            08-26-07

Nameless

The rain poured down
on the cruel, emotionless
city sidewalks
as I wandered aimlessly
with my mind adrift,
a sense of complete loss
flooding my heart,
begging without words
for some consolation.
But none surfaced among
the blank faces,
though I can’t blame
those nameless faces
for only seeing the surface impurity,
never knowing that I’d lost
everything to your smile.
So I made the best of it
and painted a smile on my own face,
remembering that, even with
a guiding light and a kind face
to pull me through this loss,
that all it takes is a smile
to send me back
into the downward spiral
once again.

#234                                                     08-25-07

False Alarm

I saw you,
with a beauty unparalleled
and a smile written on your face,
looking in my direction,
as if our eyes were fated to meet.
A whirlwind of thoughts
swirled in my hear
creating unmatchable fantasies,
as I watched your smile fade
and a resigned sigh escape your lips.
I feigned a smile, just to see
if you were even interested in me,
but I realized and you knew
that it wasn’t me you were scoping
with those glassy blue eyes.

#233                                               08-25-07

Whispered Flatteries

 The taste of your skin lingers on my lips
as I watch you walk down the corridor toward the bathroom,
gracefully, freely, perfectly in stride
(though you said you were still in a little pain).
The cries of joy and ecstacy ring in my head,
your voice the soundtrack my beating heart replays
over and over again. The passion burned more
fiercely with ever passing second, and the foreplay was excellent.
Lips locked together, tongues sparring, hands
exploring without restriction, eyes closed, candles flickering,
and it was just me and you.
Without a doubt it was the best experience,
the bed sheets flying around as this love reached its peak.
Never had I been so in love with you,
and never will this new love fade away.
I saw the subtle fire burning in your eyes,
I saw everything that is perfect, that is divine in you,
I saw how much I love you come out
in those flatteries I whispered into your ear,
and I saw that you understood the truth
as you whispered back into my ear,
“I will always love you.”

#232                                                08-24-07

A Thief With an Angel’s Face

Girl, you’re stealing my breath away
every second you’re in view.
Like a thief, you pickpocketed
my heart, and stole away into
the depths of my thoughts.
I can see that thief in you,
though you may not realize what you’ve done
or who you are.
I see that deviousness in your eyes,
I feel the suspense created by a passing glance,
by a gentle touch from your hands,
by brushing my hands against your soft skin.
I’m wishing that I could hold you in my arms once
and feel the warmth emanating from your soul,
I’m dreaming that I would press my lips to yours
and feel that life is now complete,
I’m hoping that, one day, you’ll be mine until
you steal my last breath away from me.
But I’ve been chosen to play
the hero of this tragedy,
and dreaming of you is such sweet sorrow.
Every thought, every daydream, every fantasy,
every feeling I have for you,
is all just a fragile dream hanging
by a feeble thread of undying hope,
an inclination to believe you’re still the one,
that you’ll always be the one,
that someday you’ll feel the same
and we could get out of here
and run away together until
we run out of life.
The thread waits to snap just to spite me
and let the dream into which I’ve invested so much
crash down to the floor and shatter
and leave me to pick up the pieces.
I’m hanging on for dear life to something
I hold too close to let go,
with every one of these dreams,
so mellow, so passionate, so surreal,
brought out by a sleight of thought
and the innocence in your smile.
My heart races, and I would gladly
cast aside my wall, my defense,
inviting you to consume my thoughts,
inviting this love to consume my heart.
But, just the same, I want
to have the same effect on you.
I want to steal your heart for my own,
I want to hide away in the depths of your mind,
I want you to be mine,
and that,
that is where this beautiful tragedy begins
and where it all will end.

#231                                              08-22-07

End Of The World

I woke up to the sounds of sirens blaring,
car crashes, people screaming out loud,
“The world is ending, the world is ending!”
The lights in my room flickered, a warning
that life would be over in approximately
three hours. I raced toward you, not caring
what I looked like, how you would take it,
because, if there were only three hours left
to live, I wanted to make the best of my time,
and the times were best when I was with you.
I ran and ran down the broken streets,
looters to the left, crying children to the right,
the path to you dead ahead. Glass littered
the roads, crunching under the soles of my shoes,
and I saw you, running towards the lake,
followed you there, only to watch in horror
as the only girl I’ve ever truly loved took a dive
and never resurfaced. Distraught, I plunged in
after you, hoping that there was a glimmer of life
left in your still body, floating in the water.
I dragged you toward the surface and the shoreline,
and did some form of impromptu CPR,
desperately trying to save you, but for what I didn’t know.
In my blind desperation you fell away from me,
lifeless, still, peaceful. Not that it mattered where you lay,
it wouldn’t be there in a little while anyway. I froze,
paralyzed with fear, love, loss, and impending doom,
and finally decided that, if you weren’t there,
then I didn’t want to wait to die. I ran, screaming,
back into the water, dove to the deepest part,
and then sat for a moment, waiting for the white light
to come from the distance, waiting for someone to
take me to a better place. But then I decided that
immediate death wasn’t going to bring you back,
that I’d rather watch the world end with my heart still beating
than with lifeless eyes, and swam back to the surface.
I sat down next to you, and it seemed that you were there,
if not in your body, then your ghost was floating beside me
arms wrapped around me, comforting me in what little time
there was left of existence. Finally, the sun was blacked out
but what looked to be a mere pebble, but as the time passed
it came closer and closer, and I shut my eyes and waited
to be crushed, to be consumed by it.
I opened my eyes. The sun filtered through the window,
and I saw your smiling face nearby, and thought that
the world wasn’t ending.

Then the meteor hit.

#230                                                                         08-16-07

Last Breath

You have never given me a reason to believe
that you weren’t perfect,
that I wasn’t meant to fall in love with you,
from the first time we met
to the last time we’ll ever see each other.
You’re my newest tragedy,
my newest reason to breathe,
and I can’t afford to have
these feelings go unrequited,
I can’t afford to let you go,
because my heart is spent from
the last time it was taken
and wrung dry of passion
before it was given back to me.
But I could fall asleep so alone
and wake up with my head
full of thoughts of you,
whispering “I love you” softly, as if
you were there next to me,
searching for your hand to hold,
wanting to just stare into your eyes for a while.
And if I saw you there, I wouldn’t dare to blink
because you’d disappear if I did,
and you’re too damn beautiful to look away from.
I can’t live without you, girl.
I’ve absolutely lost my mind in this love for you.
I want my future to have you in it,
I want my life to be spent with you,
I want you to say that you can see
this fire in my eyes and in my heart,
and I want to see the same in yours.
I want to grow old with you,
I want to see the world with you,
I want to love you with everything I possibly can,
because every minute would be well worth it.
And if I couldn’t do that, if you couldn’t love me,
I’d still wait for you until my last breath,
wishing only to use it to tell you one last time
how much I love you.

#229                                                                                    08-14-07